Courtship and Marriage

This is a story of the most important phase of my life. It is a continuing story because I am still courting my wife, and continuing to try to improve my marriage by improving myself. My wife is already nearly perfect.

In the Beginning

I first saw Georgia Smith in Sunday School class. She had just moved into the East Mill Creek Ward with her parents and 2 brothers. My first impression was that she was dressed like a greaser girl (as in the Pink Ladies from the movie "Grease"). So I was a little turned off. But she didn't fit in that group. It was only that the style from her previous neighborhood was different. With that style of dress she immediately attracted the friendship of other girls in the ward, especially Eileen Anderson, who was kind of a greaser girl. Georgia was really not that kind of girl. But she was sweet and kind and treated Eileen nicely, even though she didn't want to be in that group.

Then I was ordained a Teacher in the Aaronic Priesthood, and was assigned as the junior ward teaching companion to Larry Morgan. We were assigned several new families at the east end of the ward where the houses had been recently finished.

One of those families was the Robert Farr Smith family, who lived at the top end of the same street where I lived. I lived in the house, 2787 E 3400 S, on the southwest corner of the block, and they lived in the house, 3398 S 2890 E, on the southeast corner of the block.

The first time we visited them, I sat on a couch in the corner of the living room, right by the stairway to the basement. There was no carpet on the floor, yet. The house was still not quite finished. They had two little chihuahua dogs, named Poky and Tia. They got under the couch at my feet and I played with them while we visited. Georgia's dad called her to come in and meet the ward teachers.

Her first impression of me was not very good. She was not happy to have moved from her previous neighborhood and friends. She had the thought that she would likely meet her future husband in this new neighborhood. As she looked at me and thought that I might be that person, she was repulsed. Here I was, a really skinny little boy. She had already developed into a beautiful young lady. She was half a foot taller than me. My prospects must have seemed very dim at that point.

Our relationship did not advance for a long time. She continued to try to find her place in this new society. I continued to struggle with being shy, but wanted to have the fun that others had in dating the opposite sex.

We Get to Know Each Other

Once I decided I wanted to go to any particular dating function, I sometimes spent weeks trying to work up the nerve to ask someone. I don't even remember what the occasion was when I first decided to ask Georgia out. But when I called, I was told that she was in the hospital having her appendix removed. By the time I got up the nerve again, I discovered that she was 'going with' the bishop's son, Paul Pitts. That fit, because she was a former bishop's daughter. Paul was a friend of mine, so I was not about to cut in on him.

Eventually, Georgia and Cheryl Cutler became best friends. Cheryl lived next door to Bishop Pitts and his family. Cheryl first asked me out, and we double dated with Georgia and Paul. I was trying to be a gentleman, so I returned the favor and asked Cheryl out. Once again we doubled with Georgia and Paul. Cheryl and I continued to ask each other out, and we always doubled with Georgia and Paul.

Steady dating was discouraged in the church. I wanted to date other girls, other than Cheryl, but being so shy, it was just easier to call her. So we dated regularly. Toward the end of our regular dating, I did take her out without having Paul and Georgia along. But that did not end well. She was just not very fun when Georgia was not with her.

The custom in those days for the teenagers at church meetings, was to sit with your friends if you did not have an assignment. Priests sat at the Sacrament table through the entire meeting. Teachers frequently served as ushers and sat near the doors to the chapel. Deacons stayed on the front row even after they had passed the Sacrament. If you were dating someone regularly, you sat with the person you were dating. I did not want people to think I was going steady with anyone, so I joined the ward choir.

Sometime during my senior year in high school I decided to break up with Cheryl. I did it very clumsily and I was not very kind in doing so. I just wanted to date other girls. I did start dating others, but still had problems with being too shy to really enjoy the experiences.

Cheryl and Paul and Georgia and I were called as Ward Dance Directors. We were in charge of promoting ward dances, and in participating in stake and regional dances. I don't remember why, but Cheryl and Paul dropped out and no longer participated, leaving Georgia and I alone in the calling.

During my senior year in high school, Georgia approached me and asked if I would please ask Cheryl to the Junior Prom. She put all her feminine charm into the approach, and I totally melted. I agreed to ask Cheryl. So Paul and Georgia, and Cheryl and I were back together for one last time. But that was a big turning point. I had wanted to ask someone else to Prom. But as I thought about why I agreed to ask Cheryl, I realized that I would do anything for Georgia. I realized that I was falling for her. I really wanted to start dating her, but she was going with Paul, and I would not cut in on him.

One of the fun social activities for the youth of our time was the ward Saturday afternoon movies. It was a fund raising activity for the ward. The ward would rent 16mm movies and show them in the cultural hall. They charged for admission, and they also sold candy and treats out of the kitchen. The cost was very reasonable and most of the kids in the area attended, along with many parents. The teenagers would gather toward the rear of the hall to socialize before the movie started.

One Saturday after I graduated from high school, Eddie Nicholson and I were sitting together, waiting for the movie to start, when Georgia came in alone, looking very upset. I say it looked like she had smoke coming out of her ears, she was that mad. I didn't want to talk to her while she was in such a mood, but Eddie was not so shy. He asked her what was wrong. She turned and said, "Paul and I just broke up." She says the look on my face scared her half to death. Needless to say, I was actually delighted.

Our First Dating Experiences

I was not dating a lot at that time, being busy with my freshman year at the University of Utah. But I started looking for an opportunity to ask Georgia out. I knew she was not too fond of me, because I was the guy who had dumped her best friend, Cheryl. I had joined an LDS fraternity at the Institute of Religion. I was in Alpha Chapter of Lambda Delta Sigma. We had a lot of fun and spiritual experiences. We also frequently had joint activities with the ladies' chapters, which made it easy to socialize without the need for the expense of dating. My mentor for this group was Dennis Mead.

Finally, an annual function of the chapter provided an opportunity to ask others. It was the annual Alpha Chapter Polygamy Party, in the spring of 1963. We pretended that we were back in pioneer times and asked young ladies to join us. Bruce Dehaan, the chapter president, rented a bus and took thirty-two young ladies. I asked five girls, Georgia being among them. They were all still in high school, so they thought it was really cool to be asked to a college function. Georgia says that if it had just been her and me, she probably would have turned me down, but since there would be others, she agreed to go with me. The other young ladies named Georgia my number one wife. I guess they could tell I was really sweet on her. We all had a great time.

I continued to date Georgia through that spring and summer. We often doubled with her cousin, Deanna Chamberlain and others that she would bring. Eddie Nicholson was often with Deanna.

That fall, Georgia was also enrolled at the University of Utah. She was also employed at ZCMI, a large department store in downtown Salt Lake City. I often met her at the bus stop when she would come from work to take some evening classes. I looked for any opportunity to be with her.

I loved to go to the Utah State Fair with dates. I took Georgia that year. We doubled with Deanna and Eddie. Afterward, we dropped Eddie and Deanna off at their homes and I took Georgia to her house. As we sat and talked on the patio, I kissed her for the first time. But she did not kiss me back.

A few days later, after another date, I tried kissing her again. This time she kissed me back and I almost fainted. Then she asked me why I had kissed her. How do you answer that? I stammered something about how I thought I was falling in love with her. That seemed to satisfy her, so she really kissed me. She had me. As if there had been any question before, I was totally in love after that.

We continued to date through the fall. I was going on vacation with my family between Christmas and New Years to southern California. I felt badly that I would not be able to celebrate New Years Eve and Day with her. I did give her some really nice Christmas gifts. One was a sweater that she really liked. Another was a record album by Bobby Vee titled "The Night Has a Thousand Eyes."

A Rough Spell

Paul was trying to get back into the picture. Obviously he didn't share the same honor code with me. Georgia did wear the sweater I gave her on New Years Eve as she went out with Paul. He even asked her where she got it.

After I returned from vacation I tried to get back to dating Georgia. She was conflicted. She still liked Paul. She was not sure about me. She subtly let me know that she wasn't sure about me. I finally suggested that we break up and date others for awhile. She agreed. We'd had no agreement to be exclusive up to that time, and she felt I was trying to monopolize her time. I was, and she didn't particularly care for that.

I did date several others over the next few weeks. I also bought my first car. It was a 1957 Chevrolet. Then several of the youth of the ward were called to be Youth Missionaries. I was called, as were Georgia and her younger brother Stephen. Paul was not. We had our first meeting of the Youth Missionary Committee shortly after I bought the car. I also had a date that evening with Laura Setterberg, a girl I knew from work. So I was really dressed up. I was also wearing a nice cologne that evening for the first time, English Leather. At the end of the missionary meeting I offered to take Stephen and Georgia home, before heading out to my date. Georgia didn't want to, but Stephen readily accepted, so I drove them home. I was hoping just a little to make her jealous.

Laura was a very popular girl who had been a prom queen at Jordan High School. I had dated her a couple of times before. I don't remember where I took her that night, but at the end of the evening as I was saying goodbye at her door, she leaned out and kissed me. The emotions that stirred scared me, and all the way home I kept thinking, "I've got to get back together with Georgia!"

Things Start to Get Serious

I told her I'd had enough of dating others and took her out more. We often double dated with Deanna and her dates again. One night in May, as Georgia and I sat in my car in her driveway, she decided to find out my true intentions. After several hours of discussion I finally told her I thought I wanted to marry her. She had intended to tell me to get lost. But she didn't. She finally felt much the same about me as I had felt about her. So we were informally engaged. We didn't tell anyone at that time.

We started stopping to look at engagement and wedding rings, so I knew what styles she liked. Sometime later that year, I had enough saved to buy a set of rings. I talked to a salesman at Zales Jewelry in the Cottonwood Mall about what I wanted. But there was a problem. I was only twenty years old, and there was some law at the time that any man under the age of twenty-one could not make major purchases without their parents permission. I had him put the rings on hold for me while I tried to figure out how to talk Mom into going with me to purchase them.

One problem was that I was grounded. The night Georgia and I had talked until almost 4AM, I was in trouble when I got home. I couldn't tell Mom and Dad why I was so late. They didn't like how serious I was getting with Georgia. So they grounded me. I finally talked Mom into going to Zales with me to buy the rings. I agreed to wait awhile before I presented the engagement solitaire to Georgia. She hoped that the thought of such a serious commitment would cause me to reconsider.

Engagement

I did not give up. I was determined to marry Georgia. I was emotionally committed. I was also completely in love. Soon after Thanksgiving I decided it was time. I scheduled a date with Georgia to discuss our desires with her parents. I asked her to my house first, where I presented her with a single long stemmed red rose in a fancy florists box. I told her it was for courage in talking to her parents. Around the stem of the rose I had place the engagement ring.

I hardly remember everything that went on that evening. I think I got down on my knees and formally proposed marriage. She agreed! We then went to her house and announced our engagement to her parents. I probably asked her father's permission, but I don't really remember. It was all such a blur. It was such a happy time.

Later that month, Georgia went with my family to Camarillo, California on vacation. She got to meet my Oma and Opa, my German grandparents.

We originally set the wedding date for September twenty seventh. We thought that date sounded good.

Soon after we returned from California, we decided that waiting until September was not a good idea. We were both too anxious to be married.

I was in the ROTC program at the U. So I was scheduled to go to a military boot camp that summer of 1965. I would be away for four weeks. I didn't want to go away after marrying. I thought that would be too much torture. So we decided to get married as soon as possible after I returned.

We decided to be married in the Salt Lake Temple. However, the temple would be closed for most of the month of July. It was to open for marriages on July 23 for those who were previously endowed. We decided on that date. We received our endowments in the temple on June seventh. I left on the tenth to go to Lowry AFB in Denver for ROTC summer camp.

When we went to get our marriage license, the problem arose that men had to be at least twenty-one to obtain a license on their own. Women only had to be eighteen. Once again I needed Mom to accompany me to get her permission. It was her last chance to hold things up, but she went willingly. She had decided that it was no use fighting the inevitable.

Earlier that year I had obtained employment as a lifeguard and swimming instructor at the Deseret Gymnasium in downtown Salt Lake. I was also in my third year of classes at the University of Utah. The last term of those classes I got the best grades I had yet had. Being engaged really made me buckle down.

I had to give up my job at the gym to go to summer camp. But I had a promise that I could come back after I was through. I decided to wait until after the honeymoon to return. There was only a few days from the time I came back from Denver until we left on our honeymoon, so I didn't think it was appropriate to go back just then. And we had a lot that we needed to do to get ready for the wedding.

We had secured an apartment in Stadium Village married student housing at the University of Utah. We moved our furniture into that apartment at 1563 Sigma St. #5 during the time we were waiting to be married after ROTC camp.

Marriage

So we were sealed together for time and all eternity on the morning of July 23, 1965. The sealer in the temple was Eben R.T. Blomquist. The temple was partially under construction at the time. The entrance was through what is now the North Visitors Center.

We had a wedding breakfast at my Aunt June and Uncle John Hartman's home on Dallin Street near the Salt Lake Country Club.

Later that afternoon we went to the site of our reception to decorate for the wedding. Georgia had made most of the decorations herself. Our reception was out in the garden at the Garden Park Ward on Yale Avenue in Salt Lake. Mom and Dad had been married there in a double ceremony with Mom's sister June, and Dad's best army friend John Hartman. Georgia's parents had also had their wedding reception there. We had daisies floating in the duck pond there, and ribbon roses festooning everything around the yard. Georgia had made the roses from extra ribbon while she worked at the gift wrap desk at ZCMI.

As I worked helping decorate for the reception, I looked at my watch and discovered that it was not working properly. I had ordered the flowers from Mildred's Flowers, a place I always had gotten corsages. Mildred was also a friend of Dad's. It was too late for me to get from the Garden Park Ward house to Mildred's before they closed. I called home to see if Dad could get there. Mildred had already called him and the day was saved. I went home and picked up the flowers and got back to the church in plenty of time.

Georgia had asked her cousin Deanna to be Maid of Honor at the reception. Cheryl Cutler and my sister, Tawny, were also in the wedding line. My best man was Dennis Chamberlain, Deanna's older brother. The ushers were my brother David, and Georgia's brothers Stephen and Stuart.

The guests at the reception were served from a fresh fruit buffet. We had invited many people from the East Mill Creek wards who had watched us grow together. Georgia's dad had been the Bishop of the North 21st Ward on the Avenues, and many of them had been invited. We actually had over five hundred guests come to the wedding. When it was all over, there was no food left for the bride and groom. Georgia's uncle Ernie, Deanna's father, bought us hamburgers from Dee's drive in for us to eat as we left the church.

We left the church in Dad's '59 Chrysler station wagon. It was a good thing we hadn't planned on taking my '57 Chevy, because my brother had let all the air out of the tires. He was in deep trouble with Dad, as Dad had planned on taking my car home.

Georgia and I went to the Imperial 400 motel on the corner of Main Street and 6th South in Salt Lake. The Grand America Hotel now stands on that block.